"Mr. Pierce was granted parole." The five words that I knew I would hear this morning when I called the parole board, but the words that I have prayed for weeks that I wouldn't hear. I thought I knew how I would handle it when he was released. I'd told myself, others, reporters, that it didn't make any difference to me. That I would have to fight my demons regardless of whether David was in prison or not. I was wrong. I had no idea what this would be like. I'm disgusted. I'm heartbroken. I'm terrified knowing he will do it again when he gets out. This is hard to stomach not just as a victim, but as a father. I can't imagine a monster like David being free in our community again.
I guess it's just par for the course for my life lately. Good things happen, then I get shit on. I know, I can't let it control me, I shouldn't let it get me down, blah blah. I'm tired of it. All of it. Ever feel like your life deserves a redo? I'm sure everyone does at some point.
This will likely be my last post here. The blog has served its purpose. I told my story. It's out there for anyone to read. Not that it matters, or has mattered. Thanks for all the support while I've been writing this. I know there are those of you reading this that are happy to see David being released. That are happy to see me hurting. And I know who you are. Enjoy your lives away from the pain caused by David Pierce. His survivors will be dealing with it for the rest of their lives. Enjoy your families free of the issues caused by a monster like David. Enjoy your job. Enjoy doing something you are passionate about. Enjoy the sense of accomplishment and personal satisfaction you get from what you do. It hasn't been ripped from you by someone hellbent on destruction. Enjoy being able to play the victim when you don't have the first clue what it's like to try and heal from something like this. You get the luxury of turning it off and on. Of being normal when you want to. Some of us carry it with us constantly.
Maybe someday you'll be able to put yourself in my place. Or my parents', or my wife's place, and think about something like this happening to you. Or someone you love. Think about what it would be like having nothing left but those you love and those that love you back.
My only hope is that someone has learned something from my story. How it could have been handled differently. How it could have been prevented. God knows, I learned from my mistakes, as well as the mistakes of others.
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
12 comments:
Thanks for the update bro. And thanks for your blog. I'm still looking into getting some counseling... Ugh...
-Another victim
I'm so sorry. I was really hoping and praying that David would have to serve AT LEAST HALF of his sentence. It amazes me that we (the system) give sentences at all! I have a hard time believing anyone is happy to see you hurting. We are all hurting to different degrees. Sin and injustice are horrible realities. Don't forget what you know about God, our Father, Redeemer, Savior... who will make all things new and RIGHT. Come quickly, Lord Jesus!
Thanks to you, I have been able to have very blunt conversations with my 11-year-old son about the dangers of sexual predators. You have opened up a whole new world to me as far as warning my kids of these type of monsters. I have always warned my children about inappropriate touching and how it is wrong and is violating their rights, as well as against the law. Now, I am able to tell them that it is never okay for anyone to even talk about sex with them, unless it is me or their father. I feel like you have helped me be more bold with bringing up touchy subjects with my children. I am grateful for your openness on your blogs. You have helped me tremendously.
Needless to say, it is sickening that this "man" is free to walk the streets while you and so many more of his victims don't have the option to be free of his abuse.
I want you to know from a personal standpoint that you have helped me tremendously. I was sexually abused as a child and was just recently able to start the healing process. Your blog jump started my healing process and I want to thank you.
I can't imagine what you are feeling today, but I hope you continue your blog. I hope it reaches many more victims like me and gives them the courage to face their demons head on.
Thank you again. You will never know what you have done for me.
I too am greatly upset by this. What in the world is wrong with our parole system and where in the world are all of the children's advocates????????? I dont care about the facade that he hid behind....he greatly harmed innocent precious God given children......
Hello,
Like you, I was greatly shocked at this horrible travesty today. Sometimes things simply make no sense.
But, speaking to you now as a fellow survivor of sexual abuse, I do want you to know that life can be better beyond having to feel like you live in the shadows and that no one cares. I struggled along like that for decades before I finally realized that I couldn't outrun the memories anymore and that I had to stop and face the past rather than keep running. Several years of professional counseling helped me to do that, but also I had to come to a peace with God over the past. I do hope you can find some similar peace in your life as well, and please, don't let David have one minute more of control over any thoughts in your mind. That's precisely where he wanted to be, in your head, but it's time to evict him and every foul thing he ever did.
You are courageous, strong, and a wonderful example of how people, all of us, should shine the light on evil in this world. Thank you for having shared your journey with us. You have helped so many. I wish you so much good for your future.
Bo
i commend you for your courage. thanks for helping to protect kids and warn parents about this dangerous predator!
Statement by David Clohessy of St. Louis, Director of SNAP, the Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests (314 566 9790, SNAPclohessy@aol.com)
I can tell by some of your posts that you know the Lord - although sometimes your understandable anger comes through. God will never leave you. When you feel abandoned by the world, HE is there. You were very brave to share your story while knowing you would face criticism. Remember those posts when you began to feel the Lord working in your life. Focus on that and not the posts where you had to bear such bad news. "Trust in the Lord with all thine heart and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct thy paths." May you continue to use your podium to speak loud and often against monsters who prey on children! God bless you for what you have done here and for what you can continue to do with His help. Thanks again for your bravery and don't let anyone hold you back from what HE can do with you!!
I have the utmost respect for you and your being brave enough to publish your thoughts and feelings in this blog. You, and Pearce's other targets, have been in my thoughts since this was brought to light. May you continue on in your healing journey. Thanks for sharing, I'm sure it has helped others.
David Pierce is a monster. Those that have supported him and his actions are totally complicit in his guilt. They may appear unscathed now, but will eventually be held in judgement on their guilt. We all know that Pierce is just waiting on an opportunity to continue taking advantage of children. My hope is that as a registered sex offender, he will be constantly watched. Then he will be caught in the attempt, and placed in a prison system where he will finally receive what he deserves.
For you, I wish comfort and peace. May you come to accept, as all of us have, that you did ALL that you could do...when you could! You stopped him in his tracks, stayed resolute when faced with opposition, shined a light on his nasty personal life. "You have fought the good fight, you have finished the course". I pray you can leave the horror/pain behind you as you learn to live in the sunshine. You have helped so many people that you will never know about. Know that you are respected, appreciated, loved and prayed for unceasingly. Grow strong and happy.
I was sickened and disgusted by the news...but not surprised in the least. First Baptist Church, Saline County, and this travesty will NOT be forgotten or forgiven. You have done a tremendous service to many and I wish you peace and serenity.
I was shocked to read that there are folks who support David Pierce, though I should have know. People who do these horrendous acts are masters at deception. I am so sorry for what you have been though. I know how you feel because I have gone though the same thing. The only differences were my abuser was my father and his protector was my Mother. I feel your pain and am sickened that these monsters are free to hurt again. You are so brave to put your story out there and as crazy as it sounds, it does help to talk about it! I hope that you can find peace in your life and be able to put this behind you, as much as anyone can. I will be praying for you and your family!
Post a Comment